For weeks now, I am gloomy. Perhaps because of hormonal imbalance or uneasiness as I am nearing my childbirth. I have been experiencing contractions now and most of the time, I prefer to sleep so as not to feel the discomfort. I haven’t seen my doctor for nearly a month now as again, the contractions are becoming more frequent and there’s no one to accompany me. Or perhaps, I just do not find time to visit my OB Gyne.
One therapy I often do to bring back the happiness in life is looking at my children. From afar, I would just observe them giggling and talking. Or when they are asleep, I would visit them in their room and look at them one by one.
This morning before I prepare my Big Bunso’s school baon and also cook breakfast and lunch, I checked my phone gallery. I searched for my boys’ pictures. Seldom now that I take a photo of them in one setting. Perhaps they are indeed growing up and I couldn’t just demand them to sit and smile in front of a camera.
Anyway, I found this picture. It was from a recent trip to Hong Kong just before school started.
I looked at them one by one. I looked into their eyes. And I felt sadness. They aren’t smiling. How long have they not been flashing those smiles? Disneyland Hong Kong is said to be the happiest place on earth and why aren’t they smiling or grinning or laughing?
Children learn to smile from their parents.
– Shinichi Suzuki
It seems I do not smile that much anymore. The boys are seeing the sadness in my face. And that sadness would be felt as well. I have become cold. Distant. Even to my Little Man. We do not read anymore. I just stay in bed most of the time.
The essence of a smile
I used to smile a lot. I smile when I do not know how to answer a question. Smiling is my answer to life’s problems and challenges. And I smile best when in front of my family.
I believe a smile can make all the difference in the world. It calms a soul. Even makes one attractive. And a smile can even make someone happy and felt appreciated.
Smile in times of stress
Letting stress eat me up.
I am in so much stress right now. And I let that stress eat me. I must be nearing my breakdown that I opted to find a cure – my children. Only that I realized I have caused pain in them that they too cannot smile in front of me. Now, as a responsible adult and a once-caring mom, I need to put myself back together again. And I will start with my smile. Smile, I guess, is the fastest cure.
Resolution number 1: when stressed out, I will breathe in and out and smile. There is always something to smile about in life, anyway.
Smile makes you more attractive
They say “a smile is the best accessory a girl can wear.” Beauty queens smile a lot, thus perhaps the reason they appear more beautiful. Also, flashing that sincere smile only shows positivity. It attracts people to like you more as you’re communicating you are easy to get along with.
Resolution number 2: I may have aged. I got more white hair strands now than before. But I could still feel and be beautiful with my sincere smile.
Smile brightens someone’s dull disposition
I remember I had some false contractions the other day. I would want to go upstairs and just rest. I was struggling going up when suddenly, my Big Bunso assisted me. He said in between steps, “a few more steps, mama” and he would flash his sincere smile. It brightened my day. That one smile reassured me that my boy noticed my pain and that he cares.
Resolution number 3: I may feel pain and hardship. But those are not excuses not to smile especially to people who care for you.
Starting to smile again
Some days are just bad days. After all, we need to experience sadness to know happiness. But it doesn’t mean as well we need to show others that we are experiencing some bad days. Sadness flies in time but the smile we flashed in those troubled days might have caused others to feel hopeful or appreciated.
Again, looking at my boys’ photo, I did not see a hint of smile. They say “Children learn to smile from their parents.” It seems I don’t smile that much anymore. I would want to be the change my boys see then, and I will start with my smile. 🙂