For weeks now, I am gloomy. Perhaps because of hormonal imbalance or uneasiness as I am nearing my childbirth. I have been experiencing contractions now and most of the time, I prefer to sleep so as not to feel the discomfort. I haven’t seen my doctor for nearly a month now as again, the contractions are becoming more frequent and there’s no one to accompany me. Or perhaps, I just do not find time to visit my OB Gyne.
One therapy I often do to bring back the happiness in life is looking at my children. From afar, I would just observe them giggling and talking. Or when they are asleep, I would visit them in their room and look at them one by one.
This morning before I prepare my Big Bunso’s school baon and also cook breakfast and lunch, I checked my phone gallery. I searched for my boys’ pictures. Seldom now that I take a photo of them in one setting. Perhaps they are indeed growing up and I couldn’t just demand them to sit and smile in front of a camera.
Anyway, I found this picture. It was from a recent trip to Hong Kong just before school started.
MOMI LEARNS| The essence of smile
I looked at them one by one. I looked into their eyes. And I felt sadness. They aren’t smiling. How long have they not been flashing those smiles? Disneyland Hong Kong is said to be the happiest place on earth and why aren’t they smiling or grinning or laughing?
Children learn to smile from their parents.
– Shinichi Suzuki
It seems I do not smile that much anymore. The boys are seeing the sadness in my face. And that sadness would be felt as well. I have become cold. Distant. Even to my Little Man. We do not read anymore. I just stay in bed most of the time.
The essence of a smile
I used to smile a lot. I smile when I do not know how to answer a question. Smiling is my answer to life’s problems and challenges. And I smile best when in front of my family.
I believe a smile can make all the difference in the world. It calms a soul. Even makes one attractive. And a smile can even make someone happy and felt appreciated.
Smile in times of stress
Letting stress eat me up.
I am in so much stress right now. And I let that stress eat me. I must be nearing my breakdown that I opted to find a cure – my children. Only that I realized I have caused pain in them that they too cannot smile in front of me. Now, as a responsible adult and a once-caring mom, I need to put myself back together again. And I will start with my smile. Smile, I guess, is the fastest cure.
Resolution number 1: when stressed out, I will breathe in and out and smile. There is always something to smile about in life, anyway.
Smile makes you more attractive
They say “a smile is the best accessory a girl can wear.” Beauty queens smile a lot, thus perhaps the reason they appear more beautiful. Also, flashing that sincere smile only shows positivity. It attracts people to like you more as you’re communicating you are easy to get along with.
Resolution number 2: I may have aged. I got more white hair strands now than before. But I could still feel and be beautiful with my sincere smile.
Smile brightens someone’s dull disposition
I remember I had some false contractions the other day. I would want to go upstairs and just rest. I was struggling going up when suddenly, my Big Bunso assisted me. He said in between steps, “a few more steps, mama” and he would flash his sincere smile. It brightened my day. That one smile reassured me that my boy noticed my pain and that he cares.
Resolution number 3: I may feel pain and hardship. But those are not excuses not to smile especially to people who care for you.
Starting to smile again
Some days are just bad days. After all, we need to experience sadness to know happiness. But it doesn’t mean as well we need to show others that we are experiencing some bad days. Sadness flies in time but the smile we flashed in those troubled days might have caused others to feel hopeful or appreciated.
Again, looking at my boys’ photo, I did not see a hint of smile. They say “Children learn to smile from their parents.” It seems I don’t smile that much anymore. I would want to be the change my boys see then, and I will start with my smile. 🙂
Don’t worry, there are also times that my son doesn’t want to smile when I take pictures. I still keep those photos for souvenirs. hehehe! But I agree, kids observe us, they say that children listen with their eyes. So no matter what we say, kung hindi naman natin ginagawa yun, wala effect sa kanila.
Virtual hugs to you Mommy. I’m sure it is just because of the hormones that’s why you feel gloomy. Tara let’s meet nalang to make you feel better. 🙂
Wow! malapit na talaga berns, mabuti kapa nag gloomy sa pagbubuntis mo nakikita ko yan nong last na nagmeet tayo kung di lang makita yung tummy mo mukhang di ka buntis. I will include your safe delivery in my prayers.
Hehehe. Sometimes that just they way kids are! Love hear your mommy diary stories like this one hehe, keep it up 😀
As they say, smile no matter what happens! You don’t know that your smile might brighten someone’s day. It is always good to have a happy disposition in life. Wear that smile and change the world in a small yet powerful way
Just wanted to share a psych theory I learned before, since it’s sort of related: according to psychologists, smiling or laughing actually sends signals to your brain that you’re happy. And then brain creates more happy hormones and you become legit happy. So i guess fake it til you make it is actually a real thing? Anyway, i really admire you for trying to find the positive in situations even if you’re feeling down. I also love when you said that we need to experience sadness to experience happiness. It shows that you really are a positive person and that you know in your heart that the sadness that you’re feeling now is just temporary. Hope you take it easy, berlin. Big virtual hugs to you. <3
aw… sending virtual hugs to you, momi berlin. Some people find it hard to smile even though there are no problems. Our kids learn from us and its good that you gave us a reminder that we must smile more often so our kids learn to smile as well.
Hugs Momi Berlin! I’ve gone through depressing moments, too, during my pregnancy. I even think I was experiencing prepartum depression. It was so hard, too. But my therapy was to hear my first born’s laughter. Even just his smile would instantly make me smile, too. And everything feels right again. Our children are really the best medicine during the times that our hearts are feeling weary and heavy. May you find joy every day with just by looking at your boys, Momi Berlin. <3
I can relate to how you’re feeling now. I can remember what it felt like during the 3rd trimester of my pregnancy last year. I had pregnancy-related ailments that really took a toll on me that last few months. Add to that the stress of preparing everything before the baby comes. Just try to remember that this too shall pass. That baby will come and he will be another reason for you to smile. 🙂
Smiling is very much contagious! Sometimes you can even brighten up someone’s day just by smiling at them. I could relate because whenever my mama is happy and smiling, I can’t help but feel joyful too. I really hope you could be stress-free once again and congratulations for your upcoming baby! 🙂
Aica B. ♡ http://www.aicabatoon.com
Ahhh. Smile. Yes, thank you for the reminder! Here at home, I try to smile often but there are times that my resting B***h face prevails. lol. Nate’s smile though is very contagious, I just can’t not smile back! I am hoping for a safe delivery for you and hope for the best for you, I hope it’s just the hormones and that they would all leave you alone one day.
I love your mommy stories hehe, makes me want to write my personal life din. 🙂 Life gets sh*tty sometimes, believe me when I say that I think I have more difficulties in life than you do haha. I think we just need to let go of the things that we cannot control and don’t let these things hold us down. Hugs mommy! 🙂
smile can really make a huge difference.. smiling at someone for an instance can lift and cheer up his or his day without you knowing it.. the person you’re smiling with is probable dealing with problems and loneliness so a simple smile can somehow relieve his sorrow even in just a short period of time… smile is contagious as what they say so spread it!
Oh, its understandable if you can’t smile as often, considering your situation now. After childbirth, you can now be as happy as before.
“Children learn to smile from their parents.”
I have to agree with this. I am far from being a perfect parent myself, and I tend to be kinda too tired to play and laugh with my daughter. I must remember to not to say no too often when she asks me to play with her. We all want our kids to have happy childhoods, but often we get too caught up in the minutiae of life to stop and enjoy their time as kids.