[tweetshare tweet=”Some people think that it’s holding on that makes one strong; sometimes it’s letting go. ” username=”SPk3(ad*e(5d4@pEwem@tnlADFb9ZZc8:1:1″]
I left our house four months ago. I brought with me our one-year-old and three-year-old boys. I also asked our two older boys if they wanted to go with me. They said yes. Our second son wasn’t home that day, so we left without him. We stayed at my mom’s house. And we are still at my mother’s house at present.
Though my older children understand that their parents somehow have broken their marriage commitment, they remain mum about it. They never questioned their parents’ actions and decisions.
Sometimes, our three-year-old cries “papa” and so his brothers would bring him to the other house. There are times, too, that our third child would ask permission to sleep at his father’s place. He would tell me he misses his papa and so I allow him. There are instances, too, that our second boy would sleep with us; he perhaps misses his mom and four brothers. He also opened up to me one day that he will remain with his dad; not because he doesn’t love us but because his papa needs him.
I must say, our boys were able to adjust to the daily absence of one parent and to all other challenging family set up we put them into. They were able to adjust going back and forth between two different households. They never complain and never lose hope.
The undying hope
[tweetshare tweet=”Hope is a good thing, maybe the best of things, and no good thing ever dies. – Andy Dufresne, The Shawshank Redemption” username=”SPk3(ad*e(5d4@pEwem@tnlADFb9ZZc8:1:1″]
I, too, am a hopeful person. Our differences and misunderstanding may cause us to fall apart as husband and wife, but never our character. Storms make people stronger, and I know this kind of challenge will help us grow, learn, and somehow change us for the better.
The solid acceptance
In the four months and counting that we are apart, I learn a lot from the experience. I have seen what I am capable of doing which I never realized before. More than that, I have seen how the boys cope up with the situation.
Never did they question their parents. I haven’t heard anything bad against them, too. What I only see in them are understanding, hope, and love. Evident in their eyes, also, is the sparkle every time we go out together as a family.
Yes, many times that husband and I put joint presence especially when we hear mass and eat dinner. Perhaps such occasion may feed the kids’ fantasy of a complete family, and even give them the reason to hold onto hope for a parental reunion.
The sincere love
As for me, I always believe that
[tweetshare tweet=”What’s meant to be will always find a way.” username=“SPk3(ad*e(5d4@pEwem@tnlADFb9ZZc8:1:1″]
Time will come we will go back to our house. Perhaps not now but soon, we will in time. More than the solemn promise we did before God and the state, we will remain together regardless of life’s uncertainties. It is our obvious love for each other and our family that holds us together. But as of the moment, we need the space. Space, I believe, will heal us. It will find a way to inspire us to begin again.
It is our love that goes through hardships and heartaches that remains our boys’ motivation to give us that extra smile.
The extra smile
I love it when I see the boys smile. Their smile communicates hope, trust, and love to their parents and family. They know that their parents parted ways not to hurt each other but to heal wounds brought by their misunderstanding. My husband and I have differences which we are still trying to learn to accept. And when that time comes, I know we will again be together in one roof. Thus, we still keep in touch. We talk, see each other, and at times, are together on occasions like dinners and mass celebration.
It is on those times we are together that we see our children go the extra smile. They believe and understand that there is still love between their parents. That love will prevail. And our children’s happiness and extra smile are what inspire us to patch up our difference soonest.
Time will come too, that just like our kids’ smile, my husband and I will be delightedly flashing those sincere Hapee smiles. That would be the time we will be together anew, and when that time comes, never will we part ways again.
Though I don’t have a celebrity family that I look up to when it comes to an ideal family set up, seeing the Kramers puts a hapee smile on my face. The husband and wife tandem of Doug and Cheska and their three beautiful kids have inspired me to work on my marriage. How gorgeous they appear even in the most mundane task like brushing their teeth or giving the advice to make brush time Hapee time.
[tweetshare tweet=”There’s nothing more satisfying than seeing a happy and smiling child. A child’s smile is worth more than all the money in the world. – Lionel Messi” username=”SPk3(ad*e(5d4@pEwem@tnlADFb9ZZc8:1:1″]
Be strong Mommy. Don’t worry Lord will lead you the right path. Time will come. ❤
What a beautiful, touching, and inspiring story, Berlin. Sometimes it is necessary that couples go on separate ways to give each other space and time to reflect. It doesn’t necessarily mean that you have to throw away the love that you have for each other. The absence of a loved-one gives more meaning to his or her existence. I hope that one day, the smiles and happiness among your family members shall remain brighter. God bless you and your family, Berlin. You deserve to be happy and your entire family as well.
Hugs sis. Time will surely come everything will fall into place. In His Time, you and your beloved husband will be together again in one roof, truly it will just take time to re build those broken pieces which will make both of you complete and whole again. Love your kid’s smile everytime.
So inspiring story momi berlin, be strong momi it takes time, god truely knows when the time to look back and look forward.. Godbless to you and to your family..
I see my mom on you Momi Berlin.
She’s a single parent of four.
Though, with my parents, there’s no reconciliation that happens .
I hope, in the very near future, you and your kids will be more happier than ever.
Stay strong there, sharing here is a great way for acceptance – sincerely hope you and your kids find the happiness and meaning you deserve in the future!
I pray for that much deserved healing for you and your family.
stay strong! the universe tends to unfold as it should. you have a beautiful family
I too have been through separation oh, and my boys handled it well. As long as you and your husband remain supportive of them and kind to one another everyone will come out of this doing well. Wishing you the best!
I think that’s every parents wish, (well good parent) for their child to be taken care of and happy. Such a lovely post.
Nakakatouch po Mommy Berlin!!! Any Mom will surely be related to your inspiring story…
As a Mom po kasi we all want to give our very best to make sure na we will give them a happy life
This is such a sweet story you shared. I hope you have an amazing holiday season. Sending hugs your way.
It takes wisdom and courage to pack up and leave because it is not the easiest way. But it is the only way. Couples need to be whole inside in order to share his/herself. And by being away from each other, you are both working on yourselves – to heal wounds, find ways to be whole again. I pray for that day when you are both better as individuals and being together would be the only option for your best to shine through. lovelots!
oh hun it takes so much strength to do it and i am so glad to read more about the whole process and your honesty is inspiring x
Such a heartfelt post, and what a lovely Mamma you are. Sending love to you and your family.
It is in absence that we feel the importance of one person. It somehow makes us realize that their absence is the only thing thay makes us complete. Absence and time heals. That is what we need in order to feel complete again. Hugs to you. Be strong for the boys.
its okay to make a time to heal each other wounds but I know the two of you love each other eventhough your not in one roof, I know time may come your family may intact again at good time. important thing, their is no third party its only just make to realize and understand what are your differences to each other, and may God be a center of your marriage life.
It must have been hard on your family especially your kids to see you apart. I hope your time separate from your husband, will help heal the hurt and pain in your hearts. Godbless!