Diana Prince

Finally, I have seen Wonder Woman.   Sadly, I wasn’t impressed.  The flick showed an innocent beauty who believed the war would end if she’s able to defeat Ares, the God of war.  Her stunning beauty and disarming warmth, though, made it impossible not to love her.  Yes, I could forgive Gal Gadot, but not the scriptwriter’s fancy storytelling.

Who will I be if I stay

Anyway, her mother did not allow her to leave their sheltered island paradise at first, thus the question –

MOMI CRIES | Who am I if I stay

And it was when Diana left the island of Themyscira that she learned of her destiny.

Rage and Love

If it was rage that drove Superman and Batman to be super heroes, love was added to the equation on the Wonder Woman movie.

Momi Berlin

Finally, I have given birth via the Cesarean Section. We did not expect it thus husband was particularly stressed where to look for the added funds.

I, on the other hand, was pressured to produce breast milk and recover quickly.  The three boys are all attending school and they need a mother who would look after them. We still have a 23-month old boy who equally needs caring and attention, too.

Rage and Love

On our second night after our hospital discharge, husband and I had a heated argument.  I was particularly too harsh with the boys, often yelling and asking too many errands.  But the truth was, I was so frustrated with husband.  He is the ablest body who could make decisions and commands yet he remains still.  He knows very well I could not function fully and yet again, he remains still. I can’t see the initiative in him.

Who will I be if I stay

I turned into a monster mom after just giving birth to a child.  I do not want to communicate to my husband the things I would want him to do.  It is because I expected him to temporarily fill in my role.  Sadly though, for me, he remains still and worst, yells back.

Who will I be if I stay like this?

Surely my boys are afraid of me.  Studies say that kids who grow up seeing their parents angry at most times would turn aggressive and depressed.

Perhaps true.  While I was breastfeeding our newborn one afternoon, I heard my Big Bunso’s murmur.  “Ang gulo naman naman ng pamilyang ito.”

This triggered me to write an article for PSST.Ph about empowering parenting: be a calm parent.  Indeed, anger has such a negative effect on children that may affect how they see their parents, the world, and even themselves.

I have been a monster mom and I still thank the Lord for the experience.  At least I felt and seen how my boys reacted to my yelling and I do not wish to live a life like that.

I would want to be the loving mother my boys and even my husband used to know before.  Lord, lead me the way again.

admberlin