MOMI SMILES AND CRIES| I am a cloud
For three weeks, I never spoke to my Second Son. We had a mother-son argument that led me to use the rod and him to hate me. I thought it would be forever. Perhaps it was the school recollection that pushed my son to finally approach me. Or that bile reflux and extreme heartburn I experienced that night. Or possibly, it was God healing both our hearts from the hurt.
Let me tell you a story of how it happened.
My 15-year old guy came from a school recollection. His father joined him on the second day. My husband relayed to me one activity our son did. It was to draw a garden and relate it to his life.
I am a cloud
The big tree is my son. The small bushes near the tree are the people within his circle. These are community and church friends, classmates and service mates, siblings and relatives. Some bushes have flowers because they are those who make his life colorful and vibrant. The sun is his father while the clouds is his mother.
My son described the cloud as important as the sun. As the sun gives light and wisdom, sometimes, its brightness is too much that the cloud will provide the needed shade. And he sees me as the cloud protecting him from his father if the latter has been too much. “If the bushes and the tree are exposed to too much sun, their molecules will absorb more energy than they can handle. This may destroy the plant.” In the same manner that too much cloud bring heavy rain which may also damage the plants and even the trees.
MOMI SMILES AND CRIES| I am a cloud
Thus, our 15-year-old son sees that there should be a balance of the cloud and sun in his life. For this mom, though, it confirmed that my boy still considers me as someone important in his life. He may not talk to me because I hurt him, but that doesn’t mean I am less valuable.
I am a mother
I was elated to hear that. I cooked Second Son’s favorite Ginataang Kalabasa. I also prepared Spaghetti for the boys’ merienda and made waffles. That day, I felt I am once again a mother to my Second Son. I refrained from waking up early for him since the day we had our argument. During those days, I stayed in my room and only went out to eat on my own or feed my toddler.
That day I cooked for my Second Son, I felt a painful burning feeling in my chest. This happens every time fluid from my small intestine flow into my stomach and esophagus. Such sensation is also referred to as bile reflux.
I went upstairs to take a rest. I couldn’t stop crying because it hurts so much. My Big Bunso saw me and told his father what was happening. After a few minutes, Second Son knocked on the door and handed to me my medication. He also gave me a glass of water to drink. I thank him and he left the room.
I am thankful
Without that story of the cloud and the sun, I wouldn’t be pushed to cook spaghetti and ginataang kalabasa. My Second Son wouldn’t have felt I care. Without the bile reflux incident, my Second Son wouldn’t have approached me to give my medication. I wouldn’t have felt he care. But whatever brought us to communicate and look at each other’s eyes again, I thank God.
I never thought my son will regard me as his cloud. I almost give up on him and yet, he remains faithful to me.
Awwww it hits me inside
I’ve experienced same as yours mam berLin..
Iba tLaga kapag PUSOng Nanay..thanks for sharing po 🙂
Wow…. you used the rod on him and didn’t speak for 3 weeks? I’m not sure I would too I’m afraid…. Surely there were other more passive ways to resolve your issues no matter what it may have been? You’re very lucky the relationship wasn’t marred by the incident. Your son is forgiving and has a big heart.
This is truly a touching story! We know being angry led to things we dont want to happen but God always plans everything to reconcile. Im so glad everything is ok now!
His drawing is such a beautiful interpretation of how he sees his life. It’s nice to know that he regarded his parents as important elements in his life. Your son is a sweet boy. You may have your rough patches but you are lucky to have a caring child. 🙂
3 weeks is really long, I’m not sure if I can do that or my son can do that, kami lang kasi pwede mag-usap sa bahay, if hubby is not around. 🙂 I get mad too and sometimes it hurts my son’s feelings but despite that I know that he still loves me. Normal lang yan sa mother and child, nagkakatampuhan, “The mind gets angry but the heart still cares.
I think it is the pride that somehow gives distance to you and to your son. It happens to me and my mom sometimes too. There were a lot of times that I almost decided to move out of the house because of my mom. But my older sister always meddle between the two of us. I think that communication plays a vital role for the two of you to have a complete understanding with each other. He is just 15 years old which is considered a critical year. I hope that both of you will have a harmonious relationship and minimize misunderstanding at present and in the following years ahead.
3 weeks is quite long, I remember whenever mom and I have fights or whatever, we always patch things up at the end of the day but we have different ways on how we run things in our house but one thing’s for sure, we’re still a family and we only have each other at the end of the day.
This reminds me of my mom when she was still alive. We used to argue a lot to the point na we didn’t talk to each other for days. Pareho kasi kaming matigas ang ulo, may pinagmanahan ika nga lols. But what I loved about my mom, kahit ako yung may kasalanan, never nya kami pinabayaan at madalas siya yung sumusuyo sa mga anak niya. Haay, naiiyak ako heheh.
3weeks! How could you?! I am glad things got resolved in the end. Dialogues are important, one must not stop that channel of conversation. Children make mistakes but if adults too make same mistake it will be chaos.
Always enjoy your motherhood relating kind of personal sharing, very true & lively 🙂 Loving artwork by your son. Love the details way of his art. He is really talented 😀 Sigh….3 weeksss is long long… cheers, siennylovesdrawing
Three weeks! Your son is wise beyond his years. I am sure you know that because you are his mother. But, no offense meant talaga ha, my mother used to give me silent treatment, also known as withdrawal of affection. It’s not helpful at all; it can be very damaging to the child. I was already an adult (thankfully before I became a mom) when I realized na it’s not normal for moms to do that. I do not mean to preach here, I am also flawed as a mother, but I just hope to be able to show you your son’s POV…
These retreat was able to help heal you and your son. nakakatuwa these activities. It really helps young kids grow, and like this one, helps their parents too.
Woa! I become emotional while reading this Berns. and yeah I feel you! Being a mother is not easy many trials and challenges comes but there’s always God who strengthens us. Philippians 4:13
I am teary-eyed! I was not a good daughter to my mother growing up, I would answer here and there was a time I made her cry really hard. That three weeks must be too difficult for both of you. I’m glad it’s been resolved. I am thinking of Nate right now, I’m sure the day will come that we will have an argument when he grows up. Iniisip ko pa lang nalulungkot na ako. lol.
I can somehow relate, even though my girl is just 6. Being of such an age, she sometimes unintentionally does things that annoy me or even outright disobeys me. You can guess how that goes, with me having a short fuse in general. Even if I try my best to be patient with her, sometimes it all just becomes too much and I snap, lashing out at her verbally and then giving her the cold shoulder. Times like those, it would feel like we’d never make up, but sooner or later we do anyway. I let her come to terms with her mistake, just wait for her to say sorry (and mean it–mother just know, right?), and then hug and kiss her alright.
Yes, moms are clouds. Sometimes, they are the mother earth who always gives and remains patient. Father is always like the Sun. I am so happy that your second son cared about you.
Wow! What a heartwarming story. I really think, at the end of the day, we can’t stay mad with our moms even if they got mat at us and they punished us. This is because we know they did that for our own good. Also, parents can’t bear to be mad at their children for too long. They’re usually the ones who reach out first.
mahirap daw talaga ang teenager. i have a tween but so far, wala pa akong major problem and I hope I will never encounter one. kasi when i hear stories, natatakot ako.
Anyway, yes, you are still important to your child. It’s good that your child can express himself.