As poet and philosopher Rumi once eloquently said, “raise your words, not your voice. It is rain that grows flowers, not thunder.” Parenting is a challenging journey, and the truth is that nobody has everything figured out. One parenting style might suit others best, and some might favor other methods.
However, children respond better to a calm demeanor, so it’s best to avoid dealing with them with anger. Gentle parenting is a transformative style that can help you raise confident, independent, and, most importantly, happy children. This method involves empathy, respect, understanding, and setting healthy boundaries.
How can you incorporate gentle parenting into your daily life? Here are helpful tips to create a healthy relationship with your kids:
Create a healthy relationship with kids
Comment on the action, not the person
When speaking to your child, try to separate the action from the person. Instead of saying, “you’re being mean to your brother,” rephrase it and instead say, “I don’t think your brother appreciates what you did. Let’s try something else and see how he responds.”
The former is focused on the child, while the second is focused on the action. Focusing on the action removes the finger-pointing and blame, and emphasizes what he is doing wrong.
Walk the talk
Children follow what you do, not what you say. If you want your children to become kind and respectful, you should model all kinds of kindness. You should not only teach them how to be kind to others but also themselves.
One way to do this is by showing them how to do it. If you and your spouse are arguing, do it privately. Always be respectful to each other in your child’s presence. Exemplify kindness to yourself by taking care of your mind and body.
Reinforce positive action
Instead of saying no and making your child feel bad, try a different approach, set clear boundaries, and focus on the action that you are asking of your child.
One approach to try is by stressing the desired positive action, rather than asking them to stop the negative action. If your child is being rough to other children in the playground or at school, you can try saying, “be more gentle with the other kids,” instead of yelling “stop that!” Treating them with kindness will encourage them to pass it forward.
Support their dreams
Gentle parenting involves a better understanding of your child’s hopes and aspirations. Show interest and nurture their interest and passion. Help them make their visions become reality by preparing for their future needs.
All parents, in their great love for their children, want to give them everything they need, and most especially help them fulfill their dreams. Unfortunately, supporting these dreams can be costly. But with AIA Philippines’ Future Scholar, any parent who wishes to make those aspirations happen can be within reach. Future Scholar is an insurance product that gives guaranteed cash payouts that can help fulfill your child’s ambitions. There’s no better way to show your love for your child than ensuring that you can provide for their dream, no matter what happens in life.
Aside from guaranteed savings, Future Scholar has an investment component so you can look out for your child financially even after they graduate from college. Moreover, you can choose to build your child’s savings funds in five years or until he reaches the age of 17.
In addition, Future Scholar gives you peace of mind. Whatever happens, your child will have money set aside for his future needs. Aside from that, your child or your chosen beneficiary can also be entitled to an additional lump-sum cash benefit should anything untoward happen to you.
“We know that the pandemic and the volatile economy have made everyone insecure about their savings. As a parent myself, I understand every parent’s desire to ensure that there are guaranteed benefits intended for their child’s future,” said Tennyson Paras, AIA Philippines’ Head of Products. “And this is what we had in mind when our Products Team designed AIA Future Scholar. We wanted to make sure that no matter what happens, a healthier, longer, and better life awaits our children.”
Click here if you want to know more about Future Scholar and how it can help you support your child in fulfilling his dreams.
dapat po talaga hindi natin dinadaan sa sigaw or taas ng boses kung gusto nating pasunurin ang mga anak natin. Mas maganda kung sa malumanay na salita pero my konting authority. Kapag kasi sinisigawan or tinataasan natin sila ng boses para silang nagkakaroon ng trauma.
Agree mi, kasi mapapansin mo din na kapag pinagtataasan mo sila ng boses, o yung tipong lagi ka nalang nakabulyaw, hindi nila naiintindihan lalo, dun umaabot sa punto na magtatanim na sila ng sama ng loob sayo,, ako po ngayon na nasa puberty age na din ang panganay ko, sobrang nakikita ko na ang pagkakaiba, yung mga changes na nangyayari even sa behavior nya.
At napaisip ako na kelangan ko timbangin ang lahat, at kotrolin lalo na the way i spoke to them.
bigla tumatak sa isip ko ang “raise your words not your voice” im so guilty, di naman talaga kasi maiiwasan lalo meron akong 4 kids tapos sasabayan ng mister na pasaway imbes tulungan ka magsaway tatawagin pa ako para ako ang magsaway, pero naniniwala ako dun sa mas ginagaya ng mga anak natin ang ating ginagawa kesa sa mga sinasabi yun ang tumatak sa kanila.