Momi Shares:  Understanding Puberty

My second son turned 15 about two months ago.  He has longed to be an adult. It is very evident that he can’t wait, and his actions and words are always in a hurry to be referred to as a young adult. 

The beginning of puberty is affected by many factors from genetics to environmental.  It is usually marked by the beginning of changes to the body. There is a wide range of ages when a child may begin puberty; girls typically start between the ages of 10 and 11 and boys between 11 and 12. This process then continues for girls to the ages of 15 to 17 and boys to the ages of 16 to 18.

Youngsters will go through many changes during this time.  As most teens may most feel puzzled because of the changes, others will be scary while some will feel embarrassed. In situations like this, it is best for your young adult to hear about this growing up process from you as his parent.  But where do you start? How do you bring it up and how do you respond when he begins to inquire?

The best reference, perhaps, is yourself.  You have been through the stages of puberty and from your experience, you can narrate to your child the changes that happened to you.  Of course, you can also refer him to different reference materials such as books, websites, and authority personnel such as a dermatologist or school counselor.

However, the following are the most common concerns of both the teenager and parents when it comes to puberty stage.

Growth Spurts

About 25% of growth in height occurs during puberty.

• During puberty, girls grow an average of nine inches and gain 15 to 55 pounds, while boys grow an average of 11 inches and can earn up to 65 pounds.
• Both young male and female seem to grow out of clothes and shoes at an alarming rate.
• An eating machine now lives at your house.
• You hear all about strange pains in different places.

Moods

Both boys and girls experience mood swings.

• Your young person lacks the emotional development to control his moods fully; he may express precisely what he is feeling when he is experiencing it!
• Your teen doesn’t really hate you.  Only that his mood swings can be at the extremes that he simply can’t control his emotion. 
• Yes, the sweet, reasonable, loving child really is still in there somewhere.
• Changes in hormones are causing this sweet little person to imitate Attila the Hun.

Acne

The Perils of Puberty

The bane of growing up – Discover more here.

• Acne is so common that it’s considered a normal part of growing up. Eight out of 10 young adults experience it.
• Unfortunately, we are judged by appearance, and your child is very sensitive to this.
• If you had acne, your child probably will experience it as well.
• Hormonal changes and stress are contributing factors.

Peer Pressure

• Coping well with peers is about getting the balance between being himself and fitting in a group.
• Peer pressure isn’t always a bad thing; it can keep your child out of trouble just as well as it can get him into trouble.
• Bullying and cyberbullying are common and very hurtful. Your child may either be a bully or could be intimidated.
• The old approach “If your friends jumped off a cliff would you jump, too?” may not be the best.

So, here you are – the proud parent of a moody, pimply, rapidly growing eating machine. You know what it’s like because you were through it all yourself.  If you tell your experiences yourself, they might not believe you because how could anyone from the olden days possibly know what they are feeling NOW!  So the best approach still, is to share your experiences in a not so pushy way and support those narratives with love, empathy, and understanding.

Good luck.

admberlin