Note: I read a dear friend’s blog post on her personal take on “my happiness.” This friend’s name is Nilyn. She blogs at www.abovepreciousrubies.com. She mostly shares how her everyday life went, her motivational narratives and devotions, and a number of product reviews. From her writings, Nilyn may create an impression that she is one happy and contented individual. She speaks of wisdom and of joy. And she inspires me to look into my own happiness as well.
This morning, I drove real slow toward my Big Bunso’s school. Part of me dreaded seeing his name not on top. I can be that obsessive with grades. I have seen my son’s eagerness to study and learn, and I know he will be disappointed should he fail himself.
Then I went inside. By the entrance gate was a bulletin board. The bulletin board bore the name of the top 5 honors students of each grade level. I scanned all the names of each section, very evident that I was putting off the class of my son.
Finally, I was ready then. I read the names. I checked on the average of each student. Then I found myself crying. A teacher approached me and said only the nicest words about my son. I cried even more.
I waited for my turn to have a word with my grade 5’s adviser. Then as another parent left, I sat down next to the teacher’s table. She handed to me my son’s report card. My eyes were still wet with tears and I cried even more. I can be real emotional when it comes to my boys.
Part of me was guilty of not being able to review with him last Mastery Exams and First Periodical Exams. I told him he needed to be independent. He should study on his own as mama is busy with his baby brother. I would even ask help on washing the dishes, setting the table, and even looking after our baby. I could be that hard to them.
My humbling experience
On my way home, I stopped by our chapel. The mass was about to end. I smiled even more when I saw my second son by the altar. He is an acolyte. He serves three times every Sunday mass. One at 6:00 am to 7:00 am, another at 8:30 am to 9:30 am and lastly at 6:00 pm to 7:00 pm. Oftentimes, he serves even without his family. With the many household chores and a baby to look after, our mornings can be real busy. We usually attend mass by 6:00pm.
I knelt down and said my prayers. I waited for my son and we went home together. The house was in chaos. The mother left for school and the baby was on the floor. The father was repairing some electrical wiring problems while the Big Bunso was clearing the table from our early breakfast. The firstborn was upstairs sweeping the floor.
What am I not to be happy about? The house was a mess. Yes. But I have a husband who finds time to repair that electric wire problem in the kitchen. I have a Firstborn who initiates to clean the house even without the mother around. I have a baby who now starts to explore the floor and does not limit himself within the comforts of his high chair. I have a Second son who serves the Lord and is responsible for his duties as an acolyte. And finally, I have a Big Bunso who studies on his own and still tops his class. I know he is very proud of himself as he reached the top without his mama helping him with his assignments and tests.
This is my life. My happiness. The reason for me to somehow smile, laugh often, and cry most of the time. I told you. I can be real emotional when it comes to my boys.
Before I said goodbye to the teacher, I was told my son will be his school’s representative for two interschool competitions. He will compete for the Spelling Quiz Bee slated on the last quarter of 2016 and Science Quiz Bee this coming October 2016. From last year’s experience about 30 private grade schools within Quezon City will compete for the championship title.
Congrats. Good job for being on top. Lalo it’s all his efforts. Ako, my mum never helped me study. She taught me how to read and count and that’s it. Lagi nya sabi, if I do your assignments, ako na lang mag aaral. Ikaw nalang maglaba. Hahahaha! And I plan to do the same to my child. 🙂 Naging honor student din nMan ako and a full scholar nung college. So I guess, my mum did something right. 🙂
Galing ni mommy mo. And of course, magaling ka rin kasi. Pero benta sa akin ang litanya ni mum
Mo na ikaw na maglaba. Ihiji.
Very good job talaga ‘tong mga boys mo! Pag ang Nate ko madadagdagan na, gusto ko maging katulad mo, someone who seems to be able to manage everything in the household. And not only that! Can still join workshops and a few events! You already (ikaw na!)!!! And I really mean that! 🙂 Let’s meet na uli para makapag pahinga ka naman. hehe. Muah!
You already! Hahaha. Oo nga meet na ulit. Seriously, un lang din pahinga ko. Hahaha. And thanks! 🙂
I can relate! It’s really humbling when we see our kids do things by themselves–and excel–when we’re not even there for them the whole time. I hope your boys will continue to give you joy kahit ano pa ang grades nila sa school. 🙂
Yes, they are my joy. And yes, kahit ano pa grades nila sa school (pero sana wag naman bagsak. Ehehe, kulit lang)
“Big Bunso” is so cute! Your son is so smart, topped his class and still able to do household chores. You must be very proud. Congrats mommy on raising your kids well! <3
Thank you. Super proud of him. And yes, he helps with the household chores and he seldom complains.
I think a part of the guilt is also because you had expected the worse rather than take things in stride and be happy knowing whatever grade he gets, what matters is the effort your son did while studying.
I keep telling my son, I don’t care if they get a D, as long as they are A+ in efforts. I do not review them, but they study on their own. The only thing I do back when we were together was to stay with them as they do their own studying. The help they get is with materials and essays. Ummm, providing practice tests sheets. It took a year of discipline for that to become a habit.
Congrats momi. Cry pa some more. It’s good and while at it, take a selfie for … well, a future blog years later.
Thanks. The young man is happy rin and he requests for a new scooter. Ehehe. Nway, with my two older boys, i let them review and study on their own na rin. And yes, A+ ang grade nila sa kin sa efforts. But i still pray they make it sa honors list. Ehehe.
Congratulations. You are doing a fine job as a mother if your kids turn out to be this good. I can’t really relate but I know how happy my mom becomes when I make her proud. 🙂
Hihi. Moms could be so excessively emotional. You cant blame them. They are just proud of their kids.
Touching! You are a loving mother mate who only wants the best for your child. I remember my mother too she may not be as expressive as you are but I felt the gravity of love she had towards me especially in my humble achievements.
Mothers are always proud of their kids no matter how small or big the accomplishments were. Thank you.
Congratulations! You must be super proud and well, happy. Your son will go far. It’s important that even at a young age, it’s instilled in them the value of being responsible, self-motivated, and having discipline. I’m more happy that he’s on top with sariling kayod – so keep up the good work & good job.
Thank you. Yes, he is so happy with his accomplishment. And I hope he continues this kind of attitude and perseverance.
Congratulations! I’m happy for your and your son. 🙂 It’s really heartwarming when our kids achieve something. We become prouder when they did so independently.
Yes. Them being independent is what makes this mama cry talaga. Ehehe.
Congrats to your son, there are so many reasons to be happy because you have smart kids. 🙂 Being on the honor list is really something for parents but for me it is just a bonus.
When I was still studying, my mom didn’t force me to be on top but I want to attend Recognition Day so I always study but I lost all my medals dahil sa typhoon Milenyo. lol So now that I’m a mom, I don’t also force my son to be on top but I want him to do his best in school and no failing grades.
Same requirements I told my boys, no failing grades. but when I saw they can make it and because I can be real obsessive with success (for my boys), I push them to study more. Ehehe, I know I should be hinay hinay na lang. I try to. Ehehe.
Well done to your boy! I understand you guilt about not being alway able to help but if they don’t start to become independent early it will be harder later. Trust me I know as a mum of two still not totally independent 20 somethings! It’s kinda nice sometimes that thrusting need their Mummy though
Thank you. You kids must have high regards on you and respect you sincerely thus they dont want to totally decide and act on their own without the mom’s nod or guidance first.
Congratulations Mommy! The achievements of a child is victory for the parents, especially the moms… Good job and keep it up!
Thank you. 🙂 i couldn’t agree more on that.
Congratulations on your son and congratulations to you too 🙂 I’m sure you’re very happy with your son’s victory. It’s great that he gets to be independent early on it is really needed in high school and college. I think that’s what is better than the honor itself. A great achievement in life of a kid.
Thank you. Yes, seeing my boys all independence makes me cry more.
Congratulations to you and your son! 😉 And good luck to your son for the upcoming interschool competitions! I’m sure he’ll be great!
I pray he will represent his school the best way he can. And thank you 🙂
Ang galing naman ng anak mo Berns, manang mana sa momi 🙂 Oh well kung ano ang puno ganun din ang bunga, your so blessed with your lovely and handsome boys 🙂
Ow, thanks for the kind words. They excel, perhaps they want to and they love to learn. Plus, gabay lang tayong magulang 🙂
I love reading personal experiences like this one. I think it gives readers a wide perspective of what some people go through each day. Thank you for sharing this, Momi Berlin. May God bless your son in the upcoming Spelling and Science Quiz Bees!
Thank you very much. He needs all the prayers and support. 🙂
My parents were both educators, but they didn’t ask us to be on the honor roll. I was the last daughter (only girl) to get to the honor roll. But by the time I was in college, I made it in UP. I loved how my mom put it: She didn’t pressure us to study and to get good grades, but she left us the space to explore where we’re good at, and let us make our mistakes. I think those are the most valuable lessons that made me who I am right now.
And surely your parents are so proud of you right now:)
This is why I love reading your blog, Momi Berlin. It just really comes from the heart. And by reading it, it makes me feel your emotions while you were experiencing it or reminiscing to the exact moment that you felt it.
I could relate a bit since my mom was a school achiever and would often tell me stories about it. It inspired me to be like her and to be good in school. And I never forget to be hard working and assertive about the things I do. 🙂 I know you’re a super mom and truly, you are inspiring your sons to be better! Congrats to him for being the top of his class!
Thank you for the kind words. And i really pray that my boys be independent so when im gone, they could really stand on their own. Ehehe. I just love them so much ayaw ko may mang-aapi sa kanila kapag wala na ko.
I had a hard time understanding if your son passed and topped the exams or did he fail. I had to read all over again to understand why you were crying and why you felt guilty. LOL. I can only wish that someday, my daughters will also make me proud. But right now, even if my eldest is just 2 years old, she’s already making me proud with her love for singing or dancing. My youngest one will be born this November and she’s pretty actively kicking inside her mum’s tummy.
For you to have those kind of kids, responsible and smart. You and your husband must be doing something really good. keep it up.
Thats one proud moment- to see your little darling show off her talent in singing and dancing. Too cute, i could imagine it. Ihihi. And for the little baby inside the belly, hello there! ❤️
Yey to Big Bunso! I can really feel your happiness radiating from every word in this writing especially the last 3 paragraphs. Ganyan din ako at times. I super duper hate messy house but at least I know that it’s messy because my family and I live in this home. Diba? At least we’re complete. Hehe. May we find bliss and joy in every little thing in our life. Congrats also to you for doing a great job! I think it is hard raising boys especially when it comes to teaching them how to do household chores. Boys can be really tamad when it comes to that! #Hugot! Yet your first born wowed me, He even has the initiative to do such responsibilities just so he could help you. And maybe he knows more than anyone else that you hate a messy house. Haha!
Haha. Oc mommies. My mom used to commend me for being a neat freak. Then when she visits our house, she would tell me how dirty our bathroom or how messy the table naman. Ehehe. Learned to accept that sometimes, I cAnt clean everything and even if the boys can help, there are other important things to do first. Cleaning has become the last thing for me to do and I got my space when they are all in bed. And yet, relate much sa #hugot mo 🙂
Well, I guess being emotional is too common for moms like us. So don’t worry about that. hahaha But oh, indeed that you are more than blessed. Having those family members, who wouldn’t be proud of having them?!
Thank you. It comforts me to know that there are other emo moms. Haha, I am just the only lady in the house and my boys would tease me if I cry over silly love stories or even just listening to my boy playing the piano. Ehehe.
Galing, congrats 🙂 sarap maging mommy noh
Sarap talaga kapag laging good news. Ehehe.
And I thought I was the only one having mixed feelings about motherhood! Thank you for sharing this post, Berlin 🙂
Being a wife is like being in a roller-coaster. Add kids to that and life will surely be upside down. Marriage and motherhood can get crazy but I surely wouldn’t trade them for anything in the world!
God bless you and your family!
God bless you too and your family. Thank you as well. Haha, we sometimes felt we acted crazy but then surely if we meet other moms, they are just like us- crying and laughing over simple things. Ehehe.
Your son did very well Congratulations mommy. Personally, however, i think more important than topping the class and getting the highest grades is doing ones best.
I agree. Just extra happy he can manage on his own.
Awww, I was teary eyed when I read your son’s name on the top! I could only imagine the heartfelt tears you shed during that day. Congratulations and thank you for taking us on a roller-coaster ride of emotions haha!
Sorry for the roller coaster-like feeling. Perhaps the same emotions I was feeling that time. Thank you, too.
OMG! Ang galing galing mo naman mommy! You really have so many much to be happy and thankful about. You’ve raised your boys real well. Idol na kita! Hehehe 😀
Haha. Ang mga boys yan, hindi ako. Heheje.
Congrats mommy for having such a smart and responsible child. And congrats to you for raising such wonderful children. God bless to you and your family!
Thank you. The congratulations is for the young man. 🙂
I feel you. I have only one child, though. I am not around him all the time to teach and guide in school. Anyhow, congratulations! Our children is our happiness and love.
Indeed out happiness and joy 🙂
Awww congratulations Berlin. More than the academic excellence, this reflects the quality of upbringing your son has. 😉
I really liked how you wrote this mommy 🙂 I guess the guilty feeling of not being able be there 100% for our kids will always be there. I have learned to look at the brighter side of things na lang. Whenever my eldest would be sad for not getting a perfect score in a test, I ask her on what she liked most in class that day instead, to make her feel that her test core is just a small part of her studying. That way, she’ll remember more how amazed she was seeing their monggo seedlings grow than how disappointed she was with her score.
Please, do not fear not seeing your son at the top… Somebody’s top may not match his own criteria of what it actually is being at the top. He will definitely grow up being a leader if he does his best, not what the others say the best should be…
Congratulations to you and your son, Momi Berlin! You’re raising him and his other siblings well. Besides the grades and the medals, it’s the character that you have instilled in them that’s also laudable. Thank you for sharing one of your happiness. 🙂
Congrats to Daniel! And congrats to you and to your hubby for raising such a wonderful kids. Haven’t experienced the messy house kind-of-feeling, pero feeling ko malapit lapit na lols.
Hahaha. Dagdag muna ng kids para todo messy na. Thank you. Will tell Daniel many congratulated him. He will surely be happy and thrilled.
Awa very touching story! You must be very proud! Congrats to your son! When I was young, my mom would also let me study alone especially when she went overseas. I learned to be independent because of that. I know it is really hard when we don’t give our kids everything that they need but in time he will be able to understand on why you do such things. And you are one great mom!
Thank you. I hope he be able to maintain his grades and same with the two kuyas. Your mom did a great job on raising you. You are one independent individual up to take challenges.
You are indeed blessed with a lovely family who supports and cares for one another. Congratulations to your son. Job well done!
Wow congrats mommy! Right now, I cannot relate as I don’t have a schooling kid right now but on the guilt-side, I am also have that feeling esp. that I am a working mom. Whenever I am happy on things that my daughter is not associated with, sobrang naguguilty ako. Your post is so touchy mommy, it was beautifully written. I know that a lot of mommies can relate.
Thank you. We tend to be the guilty mommies even if we give them what we think is the best. We are our own critics.
Congratulations to your big bunso. Si Daniel ito no? Galing galing niya talaga. Good job for the both of you.
There are so many things we can be thankful for not just as a mom but also as a person in general 🙂 Surely, a lot of mommies can relate on this one 🙂