I may say my husband and I were able to raise our boys pretty well. They are kind, considerate, and polite. We do not spoil them with material things as for one, we aren’t able. We shower them with love and attention instead. We give them the gift of education and support their quest for learning. We provide books they would want to read and enroll them in sports and activities they see themselves excelling. We also often remind them that we aren’t rich and we simply cannot give them everything they desire. But we could help them be successful individuals so they could provide for themselves when the time comes. They seem okay and contented.
Not until we failed in one factor.
We let my mother be a grandmother to them.
Grandparents can be real spoilers. And my mom isn’t an exception. It is because she has been able to splurge on clothes, bags, and shoes. She has a dozen make-ups and bottles of perfumes. She has a comfortable house and still has the money to splurge. So she turns to her grandsons. We let her buy them toys, clothes, and gadgets.
Observing my boys now, they clearly develop a sense of entitlement and self- centeredness. But then again, they are still less happy, secure, and contented. It is because they feel that they could almost have everything and so they aim for more.
When love in its sincerest form lost its value
This saddens me. I failed myself as a parent. I am positive I cannot give to my boys their material needs so they often run to their grandmother for help. Sometimes, I feel threatened. It seems my children love my mother more than they love their own mom. Because with her, they get their wishes and commands, while with me, I give nothing. It seems love in its sincerest form hasn’t much value now because love has been equated to shoes, toys, clothes, and food.